A Review of Twilight

Girls pissed their pants every time one of these people did anything.

So I saw Twilight last night (opening night 12:01 show) and that of course means that I saw it with about 350 teenage girls. In the interest of full disclosure I should mention that I haven’t read the books so I was really confused about why every time a new character would appear on the screen a ton of girls totally lost their shit.

I mean they completely freaked out. I felt like I was at a Beatles concert back when the Beatles were cool. This one character, a young Indian man, got a tremendous amount of swooning literally every time he appeared on screen. So I thought, “Oh he must be an important character.” Nope! He never did anything for the whole movie! My friend, (who has read the books) explained to me, “oh later on, in the third book, he’s like a huge part of it.”

The movie was actually pretty good. I’ll have a video review up soon.

P.S. my favorite part of the whole thing was the usher standing outside talking about how there were a billion teenage girls and a few creepy old guys. I overheard him saying to his friend “Don’t you know what jail is?!”